Kim Jong Un’s Open Job Offer to Amy Pascal, Formerly With SONY

Kim Jong Un’s Open Job Offer to Amy Pascal

Kim Jong Un’s Open Job Offer to Amy Pascal

Dear Ms. Pascal,

Hello. I hope this note finds you and your loved ones in great happiness, health and fully employed.

Oops. Sorry. I couldn’t help myself. Maybe I’m still a little upset about the accusation that my great country of North Korea orchestrated the hack of SONY Entertainment’s computer network that is more porous than NBC’s Brian William’s explanation of his lies about his 2003 Iraq helicopter experience. Alternatively perhaps I am an angry, spiteful, tyrannical ruler as Seth “I write all my movie scripts stoned out of my gourd which explains why they aren’t so funny” Rogen would have you believe. Either way I hope all is good with you. (more…)

Kim Jong Un Fires Pete Carroll, Hires Seth Rogen As The Seahawks Head Coach

kim-jong-un-fires-pete-carroll-hires-seth-rogen-to-replace-him

kim-jong-un-fires-pete-carroll-hires-seth-rogen-to-replace-him

(Pyongyang, North Korea) – Kim Jon Un, North Korea’s humble and benevolent shepherd and the new owner of the Seattle Seahawks as of midnight February 2nd, relieved Pete Carroll of his head coaching duties and replaced him with Seth Rogen, comedic filmmaker extraordinaire. (more…)

Boehner Invites Kim Jong Un To Open for Benjamin Netanyahu

Boehner Invites Kim Jong Un To Open for Benjamin Netanyahu

Boehner Invites Kim Jong Un To Open for Benjamin Netanyahu

(Pyongyang, NK) North Korea’s gentle, kind and benevolent leader, Kim Jong Un excitedly reported receiving an invitation directly from the more honorable than a North Korean defector John Boehner, United States Speaker of the House of Representatives, to open for Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu in March before the United States Congress. (more…)

Kim Jong Un’s Nine Digital Media & Technology Predictions

Kim Jong Un's 2015 Digital Media and Tech

Kim Jong Un’s 2015 Digital Media and Tech

Happy New Year from Pyongyang! Hey tough guy with manboobs, Seth Rogen, can you say “Pyongyang” ten times fast before you get stoned for the day? Maybe less smokee equals funnier jokees in your movies. Genius. (more…)

Kim Jong Un’s 8 Email Etiquette Tips for SONY Employees

Kim Jong Un-Email-Etiquette-Tips

Kim Jong Un-Email-Etiquette-Tips

Hello from Pyongyang! I am Kim Jong Un, North Korean’s supreme yet humble leader and the accused mastermind of the SONY Entertainment cyber hacking. Am I the only one who sees the irony in the uproar caused by the SONY hacking situation considering of all the information Edward Snowden shared with the media about the United States’ global espionage efforts defending red white and blue freedom? (more…)